


NCIS as Octonauts

by Anonymous



Category: NCIS, The Octonauts (Cartoon)
Genre: Costumes, Crack, Cute Kids, Dancing and Singing, Fluff and Crack, Gen, Hospitals, The Author Regrets Everything, cartoons
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-05
Updated: 2019-04-05
Packaged: 2020-01-05 08:42:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18362537
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: For Red, because giving me crack plot bunnies leads us to here.





	NCIS as Octonauts

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RedIsAWerewolf23](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RedIsAWerewolf23/gifts).



Abby made her way to the bullpen with a nervous grin. She knew that the others were probably not going to love her idea, but considering that they took so long to find out where the poor boy of that sailor had been kidnapped, it was only fair! He had too many broken bones and injuries that he had to go to the hospital for, because of them. She  _had_  to make it up to him!

The second Gibbs saw her, he shook his head with a sigh. "Abby, no."

"But Gibbs! You haven't even heard my idea yet!" she protested.

Gibbs opened his mouth to argue, but Abby crossed her arms stubbornly, and he just sighed. "What did you rope us into this time?"

"Well, Kyle Orso has had a really bad week, and I went to check on him and make sure he was okay, and I found him watching this show. It was called Octonauts, and it was so cute, Gibbs--" Gibbs held up a hand and Abby took a breath, closing her mouth and offering that same nervous grin.

"What does that have to do with why you're nervous?" Gibbs asked.

"Well...I kind of compared you to Captain Barnacles on the show..." Abby laughed nervously. "And since we're the  _Naval_  Criminal Investigative Service, he sorta got convinced that we're all real-life Octonauts. And I may have promised him that I would introduce him to the team."

"Our team? Or the Octonauts team?" Tony asked, already seeing where this was going.

"Well...both?" Abby asked with a grimace. "Obviously, he knows that you guys aren't talking animals, but he thinks that each of you are one of the people the characters are based off of. And he kind of...thinks that you would wear the same uniforms they do."

McGee groaned behind her and she winced. "You really expect us to dress up in silly kids costumes just to see a kid?"

Gibbs glared at McGee and Abby knew that they were in on it now, if for no other reason than because Gibbs was full of spite and would force his agents out of their comfort zone if they complained. "You have a problem with that, McGee?"

McGee laughed uncomfortably and said, "Well, it's a  _kid's show_ , Boss. And we have other cases to investigate."

"All of which can wait until tomorrow," Vance said, walking down the stairs. "Miss Sciuto came to me with this idea and for today, you will be going around Bethesda, to  _all_  the kids in the pediatric ward."

Gibbs huffed. "Is this your way of punishing us for not realizing the big picture sooner?" he asked.

Vance gave Gibbs a thin smile. "No, this is my way of getting the FBI to recognize the consequences of their actions. Your dignity is collateral damage."

"Fornell is going to be there?" Gibbs asked.

"As one of the vegimals," Abby helpfully supplied. "Their animals that look like vegetables. The main one is Turnip!"

Gibbs stared at her a long moment, and Abby waited with bated breath. "All right, I'll do it. Who are we pretending to be?" he eventually said.

Abby cheered. "I'm going to be Tweak, she's the rabbit who fixes the ships and stuff when things go wrong! You're gonna be Captain Barnacles, Gibbs, he's the leader, and a polar bear."

Tony laughed and Abby strode over to him. "Tony, you're Kwazii, he's a pirate cat."

"Oh, that's cool, I guess," Tony said.

Abby went to Ziva next. "Ziva, you're gonna be Dashi! She's a dachshund in charge of the launch bay at their HQ, called the Octopod."

McGee gulped as Abby approached him, and she smiled. "Relax, Timmy, you get to be Peso! He's a penguin who can get scared sometimes, but he still goes out into the ocean to explore! Ducky and Palmer are in on this too, and they're going to be Inkling and Shellington, respectively. I'm already working on their costumes, we just need to get everyone here into theirs and then we can go!"

* * *

At the hospital, the group attracted quite a few stairs. Some of the nurses were trying not to laugh as they directed the group to the pediatric ward. Abby was practically bouncing along. Even if the FBI were running late, and they didn't have the vegimals quite yet, Kyle was going to be over the moon to see all of them here.

Dressed up in their bright blue scuba suits, everyone looked adorable. And super uncomfortable, in Gibbs and McGee's case. Tony was having fun with his uniform, and Ziva was making the most out of wearing a bright pink skirt. "Are we all ready?" Ducky asked once they were in the elevator. "It's likely we'll be bombarded by children."

"It's not like we have much of a choice," Gibbs muttered.

The elevator doors opened and they walked out, to find Kyle in a wheelchair, playing with some of the other kids in the main room. He looked over to them and his eyes lit up. "It's them! It's the Octonauts!" he exclaimed happily, wheeling over to them.

Gibbs laughed and crouched down to Kyle's level. "Hey, Kyle. You're looking better."

Kyle beamed and said, "The doctors say I have to be in the wheelchair for a little while longer, but it's okay! You guys saved me, and that's super cool!"

Tony cleared his throat. "Can you guess who each of us are?" he asked, giving Kyle a grin.

Kyle looked them over and named each of their characters in turn. He frowned a little when he was done. "Where are the vegimals?" he asked.

"They're on their way," Ducky assured Kyle. "We took separate cars, and they got caught in traffic. They'll be here."

Kyle nodded and accepted the answer, and gave them his grand tour of the ward. All of them visited every last room in the ward, taking pictures when asked and playing with some of the kids, too.

When they got back out to the main room, Fornell, Sacks, and one of their other agents came out of the elevator, looking extremely uncomfortable. Gibbs grinned, and Abby knew exactly what he was about to say. "Look, the vegimals are here!" Gibbs exclaimed. "That means we can do the creature report!"

Kyle looked about ready to fall out of his wheelchair in excitement. "You get to do a creature report?" he asked.

"Well, we might not have saved any animals today," Gibbs allowed. "But we can always do one on ourselves!"

Gibbs walked to the center of the room, smirking at Fornell, who was glaring at him. "Calling all Octonauts!" Gibbs exclaimed, alerting everyone in the room to their little dance. "Barnacles!"  
Tony stepped up. "Kwazii!"

"Peso!" McGee exclaimed, trying not to laugh at the FBI's costumes.

"Shellington!" Palmer chipped in.

"Dashi!" Ziva called.

"Inkling!" Ducky exclaimed.

"Tweak!" Abby added.

They all turned expectantly to the FBI agents standing there. Fornell heaved a world-weary sigh, stepped forward, and exclaimed, "Turnip!"

Tony was pulling out his phone as Gibbs turned to him and said, "Kwazii, activate creature report!"

The music to the creature report started from Tony's phone and everyone starting singing the song that Abby had taught them. "Creature report! Creature report! (Creature report!)" They clapped and stomped their feet in time to the song and Gibbs started to sing. "Facts! Octonauts live in the sea!"

Three checks came from his right side.

"But breathe air like you and me!"

Two checks from his left and a surprisingly accurate "Bree!" from Fornell, which caused the kids to laugh.

"Octonauts work ha-ard all day long!"

"Creature report" was a backround chant that was growing louder.

"But at the end they sing this song! Octonauts work night and day, to keep the kids safe, and scare monsters away!"

They all yelled "Dance break!" and started stomping and clapping, before exclaiming, "Go! Go! Go Octonauts! Go Octonauts! Go Octonauts!"

Gibbs took a deep breath and sang, "We're done with our mission! Octonauts, at ease!"

And they all sang the last line at once, "Until the next adventure!"

The kids all cheered and everyone took a bow. The FBI agents were red in the face, and McGee and Ziva weren't much better. They headed towards the elevator again, and the nurses and parents said that they were welcome back any time should they want to do this again. Once they were in the parking lot, everyone turned to look at Abby, who was smiling innocently. "Never. Again," Gibbs told her, pointing a finger in her face.

"What about for Christmas?" she asked.

"Never," Gibbs repeated.

"Come on, Gibbs! The kids loved you! And you sang so well!" Abby exclaimed.

"Don't care, I'm not doing this again," Gibbs said. "Next time the FBI screws up, they can come here as the vegimals on their own!"


End file.
